Hey, and hope you are okay? Please if you are not, speak to someone about your concerns, preferable with someone who has capacity too 😊
So, this blog today I have been pondering over for a while, it is something that we all have the capability to be able to do – Accept & Adapt, but I think if we learn about it, we can start this process consciously as appose too how some may process this already – subconsciously, or on the other end some might not have this process at all, but this is okay, I once struggled with understanding this also.
#growthroughwhatyougothrough
For life we are each on a path, we also each have our own path which nobody else will ever be able to experience, they have no clue what it is like to be in your head, but you don’t know what it is like to be in another’s head either… We all process things differently, we each have our own Cerebrum & Cerebellum (our brains matter which makes up our emotions & cognitive functions), our own coping mechanisms and so on, please see my podcast about individual differences for more on this topic.
Now the psychology bit to the blog, lets break down Acceptance & Positive Change and then see how they all work together as a process/
Acceptance
In positive psychology Acceptance is classed as a Positive Brain function, allowing an individual to broaden past their own values and to accept another’s, or to accept a situation for what it is as appose to what was expected. It is an awareness of the present moment without judgement / without taking a personal negative.
To accept your current situation is a huge one, I know a lot of people are not where they want to be at the moment but there is still time to be who you want to be, accept where you are and grow from there.
For psychology, acceptance means “taking a stance of non-judgmental awareness and actively embracing the experience of thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations as they occur” (Hayes et al., 2004).
Acceptance has also been a key to happiness since Buddhism began. The Second Noble Truth of Buddhism (of The Four Noble Truths) is that “desire (or craving) is the root of all suffering.” This is interpreted as wanting reality to be anything but what it is; in other words, a lack of acceptance. It is also a huge bridge in Recover Programs, to accept your current situation and then you can move on from there.
Acceptance is a crucial key to self-growth, it means you are able to take a situation / person as they are and accept it for what it is, whether you like it or not. It does not mean you are giving up, letting go or accepting defeat, it just means that you understand what is going on in the present moment & that you are able to accept the situation as it is now.
Many individuals are who they are whether good or bad, and many people try to change others or they believe that they can for positive / negative reasons, sometimes people have to be accepted for who they are at this very moment and not what they once where or who they are going to be.
**In suicidal / self-harm / abusive situations please do not accept these traits as these are trauma based psychological traits, please seek help
Accept what has already happened, accept the bad of the past, accept that the good of the past happened, accept that you did all you could with what you knew.
Acceptance is such a huge part of self-growth, it also means that you don’t have to utilise negative energies causing yourself unnecessary stresses;
Positive Change
Sometimes it is difficult to remain positive, this is understood widely, life mishaps can leave an individual feeling lifeless with no hope. But when trauma happens, or when something negative makes you feel vulnerable, please do not seek out to carry on the negative ripple, you must seek positive change.
#1 so it doesn’t affect you so negatively next time
And #2 so that you can create a positive healing path for yourself
Positive changes can come in all forms, they can look like just saying ‘no’ , they can look like you changing a routine, they can look like removing / adding a habit, they can look like smaller social groups
A positive change is so that when a negative comes an individual has the tools and capacities to not take a huge hit
From sore nails because you dug them into the floor, to deep breaths walking out the door.
Please see ‘i died that day’ for an insight on my journey.
All in all, I think when we are faced with a negative event we should always try and accept it as quickly as possible, I know though that grief isn’t a smooth journey, please speak to @suicideapuk for support if you have lost someone and struggling to deal with this loss. But with most situations it is best to find the capacity to accept things as they are, by doing this you are able to let go & move on.
If you are not able to accept a situation it means that you are to hold on to the situation, by doing this it can have the ability to cause you more stress than the initial event itself, accept people for who they are, accept situations for what they are and make a positive change to yourself. If an individual is causing you to feel negative emotions you may not want / need this person within your life anymore, (it is also okay to have breaks from people too).
Accept & always have a positive change <3
If anyone needs anything, please my email is danielle@suicideapuk.co.uk
Thankyou for reading